Driven
by the-wolfgirl89
Summary: When Edward gets in the way of a crazed vampire and ends up dead who will keep Bella from the brink of insanity? What will this do to her family?
1. Despair

Driven

Summary: When Edward gets in the way of a crazed vampire and ends up dead who will keep Bella from the brink of insanity? What will this do to her family?

I own nothing unfortunately I just play with Stephanie's wonderful characters!

Despair

BPOV

The emptiness, the all consuming dark, I thought I had experienced this before. Maybe my human memories are dim enough that I don't properly remember it but I can't believe my human self could deal with this unbearable pain. The worst part is that the others have started to move on; even our beautiful daughter is starting to live again. I am still trapped in the dark but without the others it seems a lot lonelier. The only person that makes me feel a little better is Jasper and that is a double edged sword. He of course feels my pain, my helplessness, through his gift and it drags him down to my level which means he spends a good deal of time avoiding me. I suppose I understand why he does but it makes me angry still.

"Mom?" her soft voice comes from behind me pulling me out of the dark slightly. I don't turn to her though instead I stare into the woods from my position at the window. "Rose and I are going hunting. Will you come?" I shake my head, my soft locks brushing my shoulders. "You have to eat mom." I turn slightly but don't look at her, she reminds me of him too much.

"I will… later. Tonight I'll go; Jacob said he will go with me." I turn towards the end table by the bed and finger the bracelet from so long ago my finger brushing both the wolf and hard stone.

"Oh I didn't realize you two had talked today." Even with my back turned I knew her brow had puckered, I wondered for a moment if it was the imprint that made her so jealous or if it was just a normal part of her personality. I didn't respond so she turned and left, her soft foot steps retreating down the hall and then down the stairs.

After her scent dissipated I smelt a fainter sent and turned towards the door. Jasper stood leaning on the door frame. "Hello Bella" He said his face strained. I felt a little better as if he was taking some of my pain as his own burden or maybe he was giving some of his Jasper juice to me. I felt one of the corners of my mouth lift just slightly at that, it felt foreign and instinctively it was turned into a frown.

"Jasper" It wasn't exactly a greeting so much as a statement.

"You shouldn't be so morose in front of her, you know? She can't help that she is moving on, it's part of life. Eventually you will move on as well." Jasper spoke softly with a tone of despair in his voice and I knew he understood even through his logical statement.

I shook my head "I don't think I can ever move on." My eyes dropped to the carpet just before Jasper crushed me into an embrace, and then we both sobbed tearlessly.

Ninety years does wonders for building bonds even with those that initially you can never see yourself being close with, so Jaspers embrace was comforting while as a human it would have seemed scary.

I'm not sure how long we stood there wrapped in my despair but we were startled out of it when Alice spoke, "You just need to get back in the saddle. It doesn't have to mean anything Bella just find a stranger and have your way with him. You have enough tolerance that it could even be a human." Her words didn't make sense to me. I'd only ever been with _him_ how could I ever just have random sex, she must be talking about something else or be trying to make a joke.

"Maybe she's right, Bella, it doesn't have to be with a stranger though. Maybe there is someone you trust?" Jasper spoke softly and a thought skittered across my brain and although it was just a small thought and it came and went quickly Alice froze her eyes going blank looking at something we could not see and then before I realized what had happened she was against Jasper's side clinging to his arm and she was growling. Jaspers face showed no emotion but his eyes flickered from her, to me, and then to the window freezing.

Awkward silence ensued until I heard the heavy footsteps and was met with the smell of Jacob. I looked past Jasper and Alice to him as he headed our way and then to the window just realizing that the woods had grew dark even to my keen eyes. It must be a moonless night.

"Are you ready?" Jacob's rough voice brought me back to him.

I nodded and stepped around Jasper as I walked towards Jacob. As I did I heard a soft sigh from Jasper and Alice tensed again.

JHPOV

"You just need to get back in the saddle. It doesn't have to mean anything Bella just find a stranger and have your way with him. You have enough tolerance that it could even be a human." Alice's voice broke through our despair and Bella pulled away from me as if burned.

I considered what Alice said and agreed in a way. Maybe connecting with someone new in a romantic way would help. Not with a stranger though, that isn't sweet Bella at all. No it has to be someone she knows and trusts, ""Maybe she's right, Bella, it doesn't have to be with a stranger though. Maybe there is someone you trust?" I find myself saying as I ponder the possibilities. Lee from her philosophy class maybe? Jacob I know they had chemistry when she was human, but now she wasn't and there was Nessie, besides I didn't like the idea. Maybe… maybe I could be the one for her, me and Alice had both occasionally indulged in someone else with the permission of the other; yes I'd ask Alice when Bella left to hunt. As soon as I thought this Alice had a moment of sight seeing and immediately afterward was all over me gripping my arm clinging to my side. I looked down at her, then to Bella, then out the window my mind was whirling but I kept my face blank. Pain and confusion came from Bella, while Jealousy and confusion and fear came from Alice, I didn't understand. Obviously Alice would not be ok with it. I wasn't sure how I felt about that, how I felt about Bella or anything really. The swirl of emotions in the room were quietly eating at me.

I smelled him before he spoke and jealousy rose in me slightly.

"Are you ready?"

Bella nodded in response and stepped around me and as she did I resisted the urge to stop her and instead breathed in her smell sighing at the sweetness. Alice tensed beside me and gripped my arm tighter hurting me slightly and I knew as soon as Bella was out of hearing range a fight would be hashed out in this room.

A/N: Looking for a beta! Also being a brand new published writer I ask you to review!


	2. Reckless

Warning: Lemony chapter starring Jacob/Bella. I love the wolves so had to add this, besides it helps with the story development so please don't hurt me!

Reckless

JBPOV

I heard small pieces of the conversation above and then nothing. Deciding that the discussion must be over, I bent down and kissed the top of Nessie's head.

"Honey I am going to take Bella hunting now. I know you're tired so you can go on to bed if you want and I'll join you when we get back." I smiled at her despite the jealousy I saw across her features. "You know I'm yours Nessie, I can never be anyone else's" I said trying to calm her jealousy. I don't think it worked although her face smoothed back over. I turned away making my way up to Bella's room.

At times, well more often then not, I wish for the little girl Nessie was for such a short time. The other wolves never understood when they were alive. The ones that imprinted when their imprints were children were overjoyed when their imprints were ready for a full committal relationship while I was anxious and unready. She may have appeared 18 when she started pursuing me but she was only eight-years-old. I avoided her advances for quite sometime, telling myself that she couldn't really be ready yet. Eventually I realized part of it was how much she reminded me of Bella, my Bells. I hardly ever saw my Bells in Bella until Edward got himself killed but now it was different. She was my Bells from before I started to fix her with a mix of her leech self. It was a perversion of my Bells. I felt as if some higher power was trying to make my existence hell and was laughing the entire time.

Bella was standing in front of Jasper and Alice and I could only see a sliver of her face. They must have been arguing because Jasper was projecting confusion and tension and Alice was glued to Jasper, which she usually did when she had to keep him calm. I didn't like the environment so decided to cut straight to the chase.

"Are you ready?" I asked. She nodded just slightly and stepped around Jasper, which struck me as slightly odd. Perhaps they hadn't been arguing.

I followed Bella out of the house and could tell by her posture that she was having one of her harder days. When we reached the yard I decided to do something to hopefully get her mind off it.

"Bella," she turned to me and the sorrow if her face almost crippled me but I managed to stay standing and choke out "race me to our tree?" The sorrow lifted slightly and she nodded.

The race was a tie but I knew it wouldn't be if she was hunting enough. I looked at our tree, reminiscing of all the times we had spent here, and how we discovered it.

"_Bella, please stop. I don't want to hurt you."I said softly as she crouched in front of me ready to spring. Her laugh was menacing but not as much as she was hoping._

"_You think you can hurt me? Oh Jacob… no one will save you this time and you are going to be in a world of pain."_

"_Come on Bells it was a joke-", I was cut off as her body launched at me without warning, I didn't even have time to shift before she collided with me. As she rolled off me taking position I shifted realizing this was the only chance she would give me. After that it was all instinct and I wasn't conscious of my actions until I threw Bella into a tall oak and she came flying back at me and in my confusion and surprise I shifted back and Bella flew into me. She stared into my face as we lay on the ground, her on top of me. Shock was written cross her face. _

"_What the fuck" she finally exclaimed. We both looked at the oak. It stood as if a vampire had not just been thrown into it. We had knocked down more then a dozen trees during our fight but this thing looked untouched. Bella gingerly crawled off me, seemingly unaware of my nude state. She went over to the tree tracing the bark where she would have hit it._

"_Nothing" she said in wonder, "It's a magic tree!"_

"Do you remember how we found this tree?" I asked looking at her as she leaned against the tree. She looked up and instead of a little bit of joy I hoped to put in her I saw fear and pain etched across her face.

"Oh Jacob, what do I do without him? How do I go on? Everyone is moving on and I just hurt so badly" her face fell and she crumpled to the ground.

BPOV

I was lost in wallowing when Jake broke the silence.

"Do you remember how we found this tree?" he said. I couldn't concentrate on his question though and my own began to spill from me.

"Oh Jacob, what do I do without him? How do I go on? Everyone is moving on and I just hurt so badly" I spoke the grief pouring from me and then I collapsed just as my heart felt like it was doing. Jacob's sun like warmth wrapped around me and I trembled in his embrace uncoiling myself to wrap around him. He was my anchor the only thing keeping me grounded. I wrapped my self so tightly around him that his breath became a little shallower as I compressed his lungs but he said nothing. In return he squeezed me to him. I still did not feel close enough to my sun and pulled back.

"Jacob, please, help me!" I pleaded before grabbing the back of his neck being careful to not break it and brought his face to mine. He surprisingly came to me very willingly and as I melded my lips to his I found him pliant and willingly. His lips felt scorching against mine but it felt surprisingly good. Our lips and tongues met in a dance that was familiar but foreign. He was making me burn up and I enjoyed every second of it. I hadn't felt this alive since _he _had died, I pushed that thought away and immersed myself in the flames of my sun.

At some point our clothes were torn from each other and our bodies were sliding skin to skin. I wanted, no needed, more. I could have actually been in flames and it wouldn't have mattered.

"More Jake!" I cried out and Jake swiftly positioned himself before driving into me. If his body was burning mine with flames on the outside then I was melting from lava on the inside. His thrusts were hard, sharp, and quick. His breath came in gasps against my neck, my lips, my cheeks, my shoulders, and my chest. His lips softly caressed my skin anywhere they could reach. It was gentle but harsh, frenzied but graceful. It was perfection.

"OH GOD!" I exclaimed right before my orgasm tore through me suddenly. The fire consumed me; all I could feel and see was the red heat and then nothing just blackness.

JBPOV

"OH GOD!" Bells exclaimed and her whole body contracted so hard around me it hurt. She screamed the entire time her body stayed tense. The sound of the scream pouring from her and the knowledge I had done that to her finally pushed me over the edge. As I came, I pushed myself as far into her as possible.

Then Bella went slack, at first I thought she was just satiated but as I rolled off of her she didn't move her arm when I went to lay on it.

"Bella" I said in a soft voice and sat up looking at her. Her eyes were closed and she didn't move. "Oh god! Bells!" I shouted shaking her. I swiftly got up locating our clothes I pulled my shorts on and gathered hers before gathering her in my arms and running towards the house before I got there I had thought of our actions and how it would effect everyone. How it would effect Nessie. When I got a fourth of a mile from the house I had made a decision.

"Carlisle please come quickly, to the east about a fourth of a mile. Bring a sheet and no one else please." I said in a slightly raised voice knowing he'd hear me. Within seconds I heard him running and then he was beside me.

"Jacob what-" he cut off seeing Bella limp in my arms. "Impossible." He whispered.

"Impossible should be Bella's middle name." I said in a choked voice.

"Sorry, lay her down. I assume I don't need to ask what you were doing when this happened." He said as he sprang into action.

"No, you don't." I said knowing he could smell our intermingled fluids, besides the fact the Bella was nude.

He looked her over with a look of confusion. "Honestly, I don't know what I am looking for. Naturally she has no pulse or breathing to check. I can't run any tests on her here and besides I wouldn't know how to with our makeup even if I could. My best guess is that when your-well when you ejaculated into her she was attacked by your genetics." I dropped to my knees beside Bella.

"This is my fault?" I said choking on the words. I reached out and cupped her cheek.

As I cupped her cheek her eyes flew open and she stared up with vivid red eyes.

A/N: Sorry for the wait! Forgive me, I have a five month old and she had a stomach bug this week so it's been hectic. I hope you find it worth the wait! I tried to construct it carefully so that it would be somewhat believable and in character to some degree. Please review and let me know what you think! Also thank you to those who favored me and put me on alert and special thanks to my first reviewer traceybuie.


	3. Insanity

Insanity

CPOV

I was completely intrigued by the situation before me. The likelihood that a vampire and shape shifter had ever copulated was exponentially low. This is one reason I found it intriguing. Another would have to be the fact that anything save for blood to, well venom in this case, contact should not have caused any sort of reaction. Yet, everything in my evaluation suggests that coitus with Jacob is what caused the state. Considering the smell of the fluids on them I would gather that he experienced ejaculation before Bella became unconscious. Perhaps there was something in his fluids that could break down her insides and ultimately was destroying her from the inside out? That was my best theory. Another would be that his semen or perhaps even a small amount of blood from miniscule abrasions came in contact with an open abrasion in her vagina. The abrasion on her vagina was unlikely though.

Realizing that Jacob was getting impatient I spoke with hesitancy "Honestly, I don't know what I am looking for. Naturally she has no pulse or breathing to check. I can't run any tests on her here and besides I wouldn't know how to with our makeup even if I could. My best guess is that when your-well when you ejaculated into her she was attacked by your genetics."

"This is my fault?" He said in choked voice after dropping to Bella's side. His emotional distress finally pulled me from my scientific point of view and shone a light on my emotions and the pain was intense. To lose an immortal son and daughter with in just a couple of years of each other had to be the most painful thing I had ever in all my time endured. I heard a gasp from Jacob and looked toward him just as Bella's body launched from the ground onto Jacob pinning him with her mouth at his neck she luckily hesitated giving me time to throw her from him. She flew into a pine and a loud crack filled the air as the tree snapped in two. Her and the tree fell to the ground but it didn't take even a second for her to launch herself at me, hitting me full on and as we tumbled to the ground and both wrestled for the upper hand she managed to pull one of my legs from my body and I bit into her shoulder taking a chunk out of it. At this point she sprang from me instead of continuing and sparing only a glance at Jacob she darted around me retrieving the chunk from her shoulder and then took off at full speed.

"What-" Jacob began but paused as if he didn't know how to continue.

Back at the house the others were confused and obviously upset. Nessie's heart was hammering and she was upon us as soon as we entered the house.

"Where's mom?" Her eyes darted between the two of us.

We both shared a look before I spoke.

"We all should sit down." I motioned to the living room where the sound from one of Emmett's games paused blared. Everyone proceeded to the room. Alice, Nessie, and Esme sat while the others remained standing. The swinging door to the living room shut behind me with a swish of air.

"What is that smell?" Rosalie suddenly asked her eyes narrowed and boring into Jacob. Jacob had his head hung making sure not to look at Nessie. I turned to Jacob.

"They have to know would you like to do it yourself?" I appealed to him. He looked reluctant but gave a stiff nod.

"Bella and I started talking and, well you all know how Bella has been lately, she was all teary and I was just trying to console her... an-and... well... somehow we- well we had sex." Two growls ripped through the room as well as a sound that sounded like both a gasp and a sob. Jasper was being restrained by Alice who was whispering in the lowest voice possible in his ear. He did not relax at all but did allow his wife to hold him back. Emmett, meanwhile, had Rosalie in a bear hug style hold from behind as she fought him with no success. Nessie was not even facing us anymore as her head was buried in Esme's shoulder.

"Apparently something went wrong during coitus and there seems to have been some kind of reaction that has happened to Bella. I am completely confused by her body's reaction. She is acting like a blood-crazed newborn." I spoke trying to make them understand what Bella was going through. "She has only a sliver of her own personality left it would appear."

"Why do you say that?" Jasper's voice was strained.

"She attacked us both, first Jacob, I believe for his blood, and then me when I defended him. She did however hesitate before biting Jacob-"

"Probably because of the stench!" Rosalie interrupted.

"No, I believe, because she still somewhere in her mind knew she did not want to attack him. Ultimately though I believe she would have had I not thrown her from him when she hesitated. He does not smell to her as he does to us, spending as much time as she did with him" I tried to put as carefully as possible, although my ears were still met with a sob from Nessie.

"So if she's acting like a newborn she is probably going to be looking for a human to drain right now." Jasper tone was strained and sober, " I should stop her."

"NO!" Alice exclaimed.

He looked at her but his eyes only held a deep pain.

"He has the experience, none of the rest of us can do this." I said quietly. She turned to me and her eyes were pleading with me to stop him from leaving but I couldn't allow Bella to be alone in her condition. "Go." I said softly although I didn't look away from Alice.

"I don't know how long it will take before I can bring her back, I'll call." He said before he was gone.

Now to take care of the broken hearts I thought with pain.

JHPOV

Her trail was easy to follow and I found with in five miles a corpse she had drained dry and then left in the open. It took me only moments to dispose of the body before I was back on her trail. As I got closer and closer to town I got more nervous. Once she entered Elkins I was sure she would go mad with blood-lust and I may not be able to contain the damage. 2 miles from town I found her. She was crouched on the ground in a fetal position muttering nonsense. I had enough training to know not to approach her head on without warning.

"Bella, honey?" I said softly from about ten yards away.

"Jasper?" She responded her head lifted and her red eyes fixed on mine "What's wrong with me Jasper? I know I shouldn't but I want to so badly" Her head turned towards town and the nearest human scent and her position shifted a tiny bit as her thirst started to invade her mind.

"Bella look at me." I commanded. She did obediently and her position shifted back into that of someone wounded. "May I come to you?" I implored softly.

She hesitated before nodding. I moved at a human pace so as not to frighten her nerves. I sat down under a tree half a foot from her and reached out my hand slowly, offering it to her. I was surprised when she moved and laid her head on my left leg her face pressed into me and her body curling in on it's self. My hand moved to comb gently through her hair. She sighed finally relaxing the last little bit and I looked up towards the sky taking note that we could spend the night here before I found some place better and thanking the heavens, universe, or whatever kept us in line that I had not had to harm her to make her pliant.

A/N: still looking for a BETA. Sorry I took a long time again. I have horrible luck (it's a long story). Please R&R. Love to all my fans!


	4. Victory

Victory

BPOV

Jasper's warm musky scent filled my nostrils as I burrowed my head into his abdomen. Salt, dirt, cinnamon, and the slight scent of rain all co-mingled and ensnared my senses. I could still smell the copper notes of human blood but they were very dulled in comparison. His fingers wove gently between strands of hair, careful not to pull it. I felt a calmness surround me. Then in a soft voice he began to sing. His voice was soft and sweet. His southern accent became more pronounced the further he went into the song. When he hit the last note I sighed and turned my face up towards his.

"That was pretty." I said softly and his eyes dropped from the sky to mine.

"My mother sang it to me when I was a boy, I didn't even remember until now. I think she called it the Good-bye song, but it's actual name is 'Farewell, Farewell is a lovely sound'."

"It must be very old if your mother sung it to you." I said without thinking. He smiled wryly.

"Are you calling me old Bella?" His eyes crinkled in humor and if my heart was still beating it would have skipped.

"I wa-" I broke off as a sweet scent filled my senses and venom pooled in my mouth. My head snapped towards the smell as I rolled into a crouch.

"Bella! Darlin'! Listen to me you can walk away. You _must_ walk away!" Jasper's voice sounded as if it was coming from far off and his words prodded at my mind like little needles. The thirst was so overwhelming. I coiled back ready to spring on the unsuspecting stranger as soon as they crossed our path, which would only be in moments. Then I felt myself face plant into the grass my mouth filling with soil and grass leaves. My body was shaking with fury and I instinctively let out a growl of protest as Jasper's body weight pinned me to the ground and his hands held my wrists to the ground and my arms were stretched out in front of me, so that I could not use their strength to knock him off me. He was breathing against my neck, of course it held no sign of exertion as breathing was merely habit.

"Bella calm down. I don't want to hurt you but I will bite you and tear off your head if you move." The words sank in and with effort muscle by muscle I purposely relaxed. The scent was dissipating and I could hear the sound of someone running away. The patter of feet was light and I realized it must be someone quite young perhaps as young as eleven. I had almost attacked a child.

"Jasper I promise I'm okay now" I said softly. His weight lifted slowly as if testing me I made sure to not give him reason to press me into the ground again. "It was a child." I said the sorrow haunting my voice rang in my ears.

"I know. It's okay Bella, you didn't hurt them." He helped me rise to standing as he spoke and wrapped me in a tight hug. "I have no idea what they were doing out here this time of night but you certainly scared them with your growl, they won't be coming back here at night. We should find someplace safer to stay though, just in case." I nodded my head into his chest.

_**Two weeks Later**_

"Hello mom, so I think in a week or so we'll be able to come home." Jasper's voice filtered in through the door to the back porch.

"Yeah she's doing better. She still needs help with control so she won't be able to go out alone for awhile but she's definitely settling down." he paused again allowing Esme to talk.

"Sure put him on." He obviously was waiting for another person to take the phone and speak.

"No it's not exactly the same. I mean she always had good control but it's not even the comparison that makes it so different. She was worse off then a newborn. It's not just when she's around blood either, if she gets startled by anything she is completely ruled by instincts. In fact last night we were discussing it and it's almost primal as if she is more animalistic." He must be talking to Carlisle. He had been checking in every other day asking questions only to hear almost the same answers time and again.

"No their still red, and before you ask I am sure that she hasn't been sneaking off to munch on humans." He sighed and I stifled a laugh.

"I know because I haven't left her side. We are alone and vampires so it's not like she could sneak off when I'm sleeping." His tone was getting annoyed, I pondered on if I should go interrupt and calm him down.

"I don't want to talk to her." His voice was even tighter and I knew Carlisle must have brought up Alice. Jasper had been avoiding her for a week. I had even suggested he call her only to be assaulted by his projection of anger, frustration, and even fear, which I found very strange.

"No Dad don't! I- Hi Alice." His tone was tight and I imagined his distressed expression and him fiddling with the stone I had given him yesterday after finding it on the forest floor as we hunted. It was smooth and it's shape had reminded me of a cowboy boot and I had thought of Jasper immediately.

"No I just have been busy. I've only really talked to Dad. I just haven't been-" He broke off as Alice interrupted probably.

"Alice please don't start. This isn't the time." He had started to pace outside and I could hear the wood creak under his boots though I didn't hear his steps.

"I'm not mad I promise. I just haven't been up to talking with everything going on here." He stopped pacing suddenly.

"I don't want to talk about this now, Alice." His voice dropped so low I could barely hear. Curiosity got the better of me and I slid off the bed quietly moving closer but also moving in the direction of the broom cupboard so it would appear I was getting something from there.

"Alice I do love you it's just-" His words halted and I felt like if I was alive my heart would have to. I didn't understand why hearing Jasper saying he loved his wife hurt so much but it did.

"It's complicated that's why it keeps changing. I love you and I have for decades but at some point things have changed." I inhaled sharply at his words, was he saying that he didn't want to be with Alice? The door suddenly opened and I startled and my instincts took over I sprung before thinking and knocked Jasper onto the floor my body slamming down into him and his cell phone slid across the floor and into the wall with a loud thud. I stared at Jasper just as shocked as he looked. We laid there for a moment eyes locked not moving at all until a voice rang through the room.

"Jasper? Are you there?" we both quickly got to our feet and he retrieved his phone.

"Sorry Alice. Look I have to go. I'll talk to you later." He said not taking his eyes from mine. He looked calm but I could tell he was upset. He hung up the phone and walked up to me so that I was looking up at him. "You were listening in on my call."

"I'm sorry I just..." I broke off not knowing what to say. I just am nosy? I just lost my entire brain? I just am jealous? WOAH where did that come from!

"You were curious... So do you want me to tell you about it?" He was looking at me with such intensity that I couldn't tell if I should say yes or no so I just gaped at him until he spoke again. "I love Alice but I'm not in love with her anymore. When we met we paired up out of convenience and eventually I fell in love but it was never an easy relationship with us. I wanted the type of love Carlisle and Esme have, the type Rose and Em do, and the type you had with Edward." His eyes pierced into mine and I didn't look away from his face. " I don't know if it will work out but I think I've finally found that person but it's not until she changed completely that I felt so certain about my feelings" He paused and his eyes left mine, looking over my head and staring into space.

"Who?" I didn't even think before I asked I was so focused on him I didn't realize the question had bubbled up and then spilled out. His eyes snapped to mine.

"Are you sure you want to know?" his eyes were even more intense and held some unreadable emotion. I nodded slowly. Then he had his left arm around my waist pulling me into him and his right was in my hair, at the base of my head, lightly pulling it to tip my head back and his lips collided with mine. It felt like it was in slow motion although it happened rather fast and when our lips met I gasped before pushing myself further into him and meeting his kiss with an equal amount of passion. I'm not sure how long we stood there kissing. Without the need for air it was immeasurable and we continued on until he was sitting on the edge of the bed with me straddling him. His left hand was now on my butt and his right had thoroughly mussed my hair. Finally I pulled away leaning my forehead on his my eyes were closed and when I did open them I realized the evening sun that had been shining when we started had long past set and the forest was dark. I pulled back and looked into his eyes. They were blacker then the night but the lazy smile on his face was evidence that those black eyes only meant good things.

"Darlin', that was the best kiss I have ever had." He sighed and his hands on my butt brought my lower body closer into him so that I could feel him hardened and straining at the fly of his jeans.

"You haven't seen nothin' yet cowboy." I said smirking.

"Well I guess I can't consider this trip a victory until I have seen it all then." His lazy grin got a little wider and his eyes smoldered. I think I just melted into a puddle of desire.

A/N: So I tried to finish and get this posted within 24 hrs of my last but I didn't =(. However within 48 is still a personal best! Review please. I love for you to put me on alert but the best gift is a few words! =D


	5. Ecstasy

WARNING: Very potent lemons please do not read if your a minor... not that I can stop you... but this is very mature content.

Ecstasy

JPOV

It had been two days since our kiss and although we were still being affectionate, holding hands, brushing against each other, occasionally a light kiss, we were both more withdrawn then when we kissed. We both were trying to sort through our jumbled emotions and it was scary as I did to realize I had fallen completely in love with Bella. There was no way I could go back to Alice. I thought a lot about Alice too, I was sure that by now she'd seen me and Bella together but I also knew it was probably tearing her up and as I did still love Alice, although in a different way, I felt guilty.

I turned my head from the night sky to Bella, her face didn't give away the burning guilt I felt radiating off of her.

"Bella" I said softly and reached out and took her hand. She turned her eyes from the sky as well and looked into my eyes.

"I need to talk to Alice." She said simply knowing I could feel what she was feeling.

"OK." I said in understanding and she sat up from her spot in the grass beside me. She took her phone from her pocket and swiftly dialed. It rang only once before I heard Alice's voice.

"Bella." The tone was emotionless almost robotic.

"Alice... I'm so sorry." The pain in her voice made my still heart bleed and I sat up and tried to take her hand but she pulled it away. "You are my best friend, my sister. I didn't mean for this to happen but I have betrayed you."

"You did." Alice's words cut through Bella like a knife, even though her tone was flat.

"I'll leave Alice. If you want I'll leave Jasper and he'll come back to you." I couldn't believe the words and as I felt her sincerity I got angry. I felt it boiling in me. Then I heard Alice.

"NO! Bella don't! Jasper needs you. You need him. I'm so sorry Bella I was so blinded by my love for him. You have to stay it's what is meant to be!" Her voice was panicky and full of sincerity. I didn't understand her sudden change of mind.

"Alice are you sure. I love you so much and I hate to think I've hurt you." Bella all but whispered.

"I'm sure Bella. It hurts but it's what is right. I just didn't see it till now. Be with him Bella. Love him like you want to, like you need to." Then I heard the phone line go dead.

Bella turned to me. Her eyes were so wide and full and I felt my previous anger die down to only a small amount of hurt.

"You would leave me?" I asked her the hurt apparent in my voice.

"If Alice thought it was right I would. I knew if she saw a better life for you two then she does for us she would ask me to leave but if we were meant to be she'd give you up willingly. That's what I love about Alice, when it comes right down to it she's always so selfless." She said quietly. My hurt dissolved knowing that she didn't even realize how amazingly selfless she was herself. She would have left me only if she thought I'd be happier without her. She would do that because she loved me.

"I love you. I am completely irrevocably in love with you darlin" As I said the words out loud for the first time I felt her own love and joy radiate from her like sunshine on a summer day. I'm sure that love made me glow just as brightly as the summer sun as well.

She climbed in my lap straddling me and the brought her lips to mine. Our mouths moved against each other slowly and sweetly our tongues meeting sensually and even though it was completely different from our passionate first kiss it was just as perfect. Her body pressed into mine, our kiss, and the love I was projecting and she was returning was so sweet and perfect that I felt the need to be with her forever, the need to make her body as much mine as her mind and soul were. I pulled back from her mouth grudgingly but wanting to ask the question desperately.

"Bella, let me make love to you?" I asked her staring into those beautiful eyes and seeing her soul. Her assent was given in a swift nod before her lips were on mine again. I laid her back gently in the grass. I was moving at a human pace as I wanted this first part, seeing her all for the first time, to take as long as possible. As I took her shirt in my hands to lift it. Her hands took mine stilling them.

"Here?" She asked and I could see the nervousness and confusion in her eyes as well as feel it.

"Well we could go inside, but it's so beautiful out here tonight and no one will see us. Also where better to do such a natural act as making love to my mate then out here in nature on the soft grass and under a blanket of stars." I knew Em would take the dickens out of me if he'd just heard that but I didn't care. I loved Bella so much and wanted her to understand what I was thinking as well as know it.

"Your right. Jasper, make love to me now and here." She said her love was overwhelming and I let my mouth find hers pouring all my love and passion out both into the kiss and through my projections.

I pulled away my hands finding the hem of her shirt and I slowly pulled it up reveling in each piece of skin that was revealed. My hands skimming along her sides and her forever blissfully perfect skin. When I reached her bra line I moved my thumbs to skim along the underside of her bra knowing her sensitive skin could feel the brush through her bra cups. She sighed and my cock hardened even further. I finished pulling her shirt over her head and laid it to the side as my eyes took in her beautiful body. I then moved my hands behind her back brushing my fingers along her bra line. My fingers pinched the fabric near the clasp and felt it give way. I slowly brought my hand up to her shoulders and pulled at the straps letting them fall down her arms. Her breasts were revealed slowly to me, her skin so white in the moonlight and refracting it the tiniest bit. As I put her bra on her shirt I took in her rounded breasts perfect in proportion and symmetry. She was just over a hand full each making her just slightly more developed then Alice. I pushed that thought away only wanting to think of Bella. This was our moment.

"God Bella you are so beautiful." I said as I brought a hand up to cup her right breast and then letting my fingers slide down the side of the swell of her breast so my thumb could thrum over her nipple. She moaned and laid back down on the forest floor. My hand followed and my other hand braced on the ground beside her as I bent my head and took her other nipple in my mouth. She tasted so sweet. I usually didn't remember the taste of food from before I was changed but the thought of sweet honey butter my mama made me when I was about to go to war was the exact right comparison to Bella's sweet taste. I moaned on her nipple as my tongue swirled around her pert bud and she moaned in return a hand sliding in my hair.

After I had her moaning swirl after swirl pinch after pinch to each nipple I pulled back looking at her body. She was stretched out and her eyes were half lidded and pitch black. My mouth found hers and I had a sudden urge to mark her as mine. I pulled back from our kiss my face only a breath away from hers I asked.

"Bella, may I mark you? May I mark you as my mate?" She nodded a moan emitting from her throat.

"Mark me Jasper. I'm yours." She said the moan still in her voice.

I bent my head back to her breast swirling my tongue around her nipple again until she writhed under me then I gently bit into her beautiful breast just beside her nipple. As I did I projected all my need, my lust, my love. And she screamed out her body convulsing. I felt the swell of ecstasy take her over and felt every bit of her orgasm and I had a small orgasm too without ejaculation, the experience was amazing as I had never felt it before. As we both came down form our high I laid gentle kisses over her chest and stomach coming to the band of her jeans I leaned up a little and worked the button out of the hole and then the zip down. My chest constricted as I slowly brought my hands to the band and begun to slide her jeans down past her hips as she lifted them for me. Her panties were a deep red color and a string bikini cut. My mouth kissed the front of her covered mound as I continued pulling her jeans off and then tossed them to the side I kissed over the panties for a few moments before retreating to pull them off too. As she was revealed to me I started to tremble.

"Oh god! Darlin you are so beautiful, I can hardly believe your mine." I said as I laid down between her legs. I laid kisses on her thighs trailing my mouth up to her sweet spot and then I opened her outer lips with my fingers and looked at her inhaling the beautiful scent before letting my mouth descend onto her clit. She cried out as soon as my mouth touched her.

My mouth elicited moans and pants from her and when two of my fingers entered her swiftly she screamed out again for me this time my name falling from her lips as she rode her orgasm. An orgasm of my own rode through me, again without ejaculation. After pushing her over the edge two more times with my fingers and mouth I couldn't stand it anymore and quickly shed my clothes. I was about to position my self to take her when her hands on my chest stopped me.

"Jasper I want to feel you and touch you first." She said in a hushed voice. I hesitated wanting to be in her so badly but nodded and rolled off of her and onto my back in the grass. Her hands tentatively started roaming at my chest and trailed down with feather light touches. Then her mouth followed the trail. Soon she was knelt between my legs and her hand traced the outline of my hard cock before grasping at it. This made me hiss in pleasure. Her eyes shot up to mine and I projected the pleasure I felt to her. In return she tugged with a twist and I moaned out still staring into her eyes. The pleasure and heat was building quickly in my body.

"Bella please I want to come inside you." I moaned out as she did another wicked tug and twist to my cock. I closed my eyes trying to focus on keeping my self from cumming and her hand left my cock and I heard her soft movements and opened my eyes to find her poised over me she took my cock back in her hand and lined me up, her moist heat making me more excited. Then she slid me into herself. She was so hot and tight and I gasped at the feeling.

"God Bella. Oh Darlin! You feel so good." Then she began to ride me and I was delirious with my need for her. Her hips swiveled and bounced as I grasped them tightly using it as leverage as I pumped my hips off the ground into her. I wished I could last longer but all too soon I felt it imminent.

"Bella I'm gonna cum please do it with me!" I begged as one hand left her hip to come to our joined bodies and pinch her clit. Then she did. It was beautiful and perfect as my hips surged up releasing my self into her and she screamed my name. I had never found anything more perfect and I knew I had just glimpsed heaven.

We made love three more times and night faded into morning and found us laying together her head on my chest, us both satisfied temporarily.

"Jasper?" she asked softly.

"Hmm?"

Will it always be that way, that good?... I never... Edward and I had such a great love but I never felt like that... I think I saw heaven at some point." She said her voice and her emotions blissful.

"I dunno I haven't ever felt that way either. I sure hope so though" My hand came up to thread into her messy hair. "I love you darlin."

"And I you Jasper." She sighed in contentment.

A/N: So LONGEST chapter and very sweet lemon! You love it right? Thanks to all my supportive fans. I love when you all gush over my story or when you leave critiques or questions! Hint hint... lol. So one more chapter. I know it's sad isn't it =(. Good news is I've decided when I'm done I'm going to do some outtakes. I wanted this to be more about Bella and Jasper then anything else so I'm going to write outtakes from the others point of views and times that were only hinted at in this story. Also I plan to do an AH Bella/Jasper story and an AH Bella/Jacob story simultaneously in the near future. I've already started to outline them. I'm getting married next weekend so it will probably be the week after that before I post the first chapters of those. If I have time I will try to get the outtakes up before and I will definitely have the last chapter posted by Tuesday night. Love ya guys and remember to leave me a few words.


	6. Nascent

Nascent

BPOV

I was swept into Esme's arms before I even stepped all the way through the door. I smiled widely and returned her fierce hold on me. Behind me Jasper laughed, a sound I had became so familiar with over the last few days that I shouldn't still feel like my dead heart is going to leap out of my chest, but I do. I pulled back from Esme looking at her for the first time in weeks.

"I missed you so much mom!" I gushed, being with Jasper had made me less conservative with my emotions. I never thought I'd be one to share so much of myself but now I found it as natural as humans found breathing. It was very freeing to not restrain myself at all.

She beamed at me in return and then I was handed off to Carlisle. He hugged me gently and then held me at arm's length. "How are you feeling?" his voice was threaded with both compassion and curiosity.

"Just the same as when you asked yesterday. Everyday is the same and different." I laughed before continuing, "I promise I'll let you poke and prod at me once I'm settled in." His eyes lit up at that and he stepped back.

"Speaking of settled... um... what are we going to do about arrangements? I hadn't thought about it until now." Jasper voiced.

"Well I thought about it luckily, and got it all sorted." Said Esme beaming in pride, "C'mon let me show you!" She walked down the hall and up the stairs. Jasper and I followed, him grabbing my hand as we walked.

Instead of turning left at the top of the stairs as I expected I found myself being led down a hall directly in front of us where a wall and then study used to exist. There were no other doors except the one on the end of the hall. Double glass doors with frosted panes and robin's egg blue trim stood in front of us. As she opened the doors, pushing them inward with flourish, a beautiful room was revealed to us. Light blues, grays, and a sandy brown all co-mingled to make the room peaceful. The bed was covered with a silver comforter, pillows in different hues of blue, and robin's egg blue sheets. The canopy bed frame was a pale gray and held gorgeous billows of a blue gossamer material threaded through wood slats overhead and hanging tied back on each side of the four bed posts. Opposite the bed stood a sand colored mantle place surrounding a large fire place. The rounded hearth was made of large smooth gray rocks and the floor beneath it and our feet was wood in a light sand color. Huge windows embraced the opposite wall, which accented the other gray walls with a light blue, on either side of another set of frosted glass double doors which were open leading onto a balcony patio. I was stunned. It was so beautiful and absolutely perfect for Jasper and I.

"Mom, wow, you really outdid yourself this time." I heard Jasper say as he slid his arms around my waist from the back leaning into me.

"It's stunning." I said in agreement "Thank you." She beamed at us both.

"It's completely my pleasure. I wanted you to have a little nest of your own. I of course decided to leave space for you add things if you wanted, like bookshelves and such. The closet is full I moved most of your clothes from your individual closets as well as did a little shopping. I otherwise left both of your rooms untouched. I figured you should be able to decide what to do with your belongings and respectable rooms." She turned towards the doorway to exit "I'll let you two have some time to yourselves. Carlisle and myself are going hunting, and of course the others aren't staying here right now so you can... enjoy yourselves." She said with a knowing smile pulling the doors shut behind her. Jasper turned me in his arms and leaned down resting his forehead against mine.

"What do you think my sweet Bella?" He said his southern accent becoming more present. I grinned knowing he allowed it because I took pleasure in hearing it.

"I think we should break in the new bed... and then maybe the floor." I said grinning.

"Don't forget the walls Darlin, or the balcony." He said his own grin becoming wider.

"Sounds like we have lot of work to do cowboy, you better saddle up." I said my eyes shining with mischief.

"Yes Ma'am!" He said excitedly in a thick drawl before leaning down to kiss me.

_**Three years later**_

I was flying to the front door before the car even pulled into the circle drive. I pulled open the door trying very hard not to yank it off it's hinges in my haste to get it open. As the car pulled up I saw Alice beaming from the front passenger seat. Before the car had pulled to a complete stop she was out of the car dancing my way as I hurtled to meet her. We crashed together the sound echoing off the trees as we embraced each other in a fierce hug. I was so happy to see her after all this time. I was even happier to know that we were still best friends after all that had happened.

When I had got her call last month I had been happy but shocked when she threatened to not ever talk to me again if I didn't invite her to mine and Jasper's wedding. I was giddy when she told me she'd met someone.

"So where's your hunk of burning love?" I asked her giggling with glee, looking over to see a woman struggling to wrestle a bag out of the trunk. She turned to look also.

"Oh my goodness! I'm sorry hon, leave it ,the guys will get our stuff." She said to the woman who then straightened and walked towards us. Her smile was wide and energetic, she was almost Alice's height, perhaps a half an inch taller, she had more curves though. Her hair was black, thick and curly resting on her shoulders and swaying the slightest bit as she walked. As she came to stand next to Alice I was surprised when she wrapped her arm around the woman's waist before turning back to me. "I wouldn't call her a hunk but this is my burning love. Bella meet Cassie, Cassie this is Bella." Cassie held her hand out to me her smile becoming wider. Before my hand met hers though I heard Nessie.

"Mom! Why didn't you tell me Aunt Alice was here? We would have.. um... wrapped things up faster." She said as she ran into Alice's arms them both hugging each other tightly. After a year of being away from the family Jacob and Nessie had finally came back claiming to have worked past their problems and that they were more in love then ever. It was completely true I soon realized. Nessie was no longer apt to jealous fits and Jacob was a lot more affectionate. Unfortunately, it also meant that their sex life had greatly improved. While I was happy for them, as her mother I really preferred not to hear them.

"So," Alice said pulling away, "Anything new with you Nessie?"

"Other then adjusting to my mom being a complete animal," She said grinning humorously " not much."

These jokes were poked at me so often since Carlisle had studied me that I just smiled in return. After some time, he had discovered that my makeup and body chemistry had altered and held not only chromosomes that indicated my vampirism characteristics but ones indicating wolf ones as well. I didn't shape shift or anything, I just was more driven by my instincts. Although he could find nothing when he researched, he explained that his best guess was that my body chemistry changed first, much like it does when a women's pregnant, and then my genetic traits altered, although the only reason he could fathom the latter would happen was if I had actually conceived and then my body being unable to actually support pregnancy had for an unknown reasons absorbed the cells. It of course happened so quickly that he said even if he'd been there the whole time and been evaluating me the chances were he would not have caught it. So, in a way it was still a mystery. He decided he would journal his findings and theories in the off chance that this happened again.

"So are you ready to be Mrs Jasper Whitlock?" Alice asked with a tinkling laugh, pulling me from my thoughts, and I knew that I was never more ready for anything in my existence.

A/N: So I hope you like this last chapter. I know it's short and I thought about adding more but that last part just spoke more in volume then anything else I could think of. It felt right. I hope you leave reviews and as I'm sick today I'll be working on the outtakes so hopefully I'll get those up soon too. Remember to tell me what you think.. hate it or love it (but especially if you love it lol!) Thank you for reading and reviewing! Also I'd like to give a special thanks to my faithful readers and reviewers who have been there since the beginning, patiently waiting for each chapter you guys rock!


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